To be completely vulnerable, this time of year is when I struggle the most spiritually. It's like I'm so far from that camp high I felt nine months ago, school is so close to being over, and I just find "better things to do" than intentionally make time for just me and God. This is the time of year where I find myself going through the motions. It's not like this straying away from God is on purpose, it just sort of...happens.
So as I was cleaning, the song "Man of Sorrows" came on by Hillsong United. And I REALLY love that song. Usually when the song starts playing, I'm singing along in my own mini concert, but tonight I just listened to the words. How powerful lyrics in a song can be.
"Now my debt is paid
It is paid in full
By the precious blood
That my Jesus spilled
Now the curse of sin
Has no hold on me
Whom the Son sets free
Oh is free indeed
See the stone is rolled away
Behold the empty tomb
Hallelujah God be praised
He's risen from the grave"
This is what Jesus reminded me of tonight:
All that Jesus went through, He did so because of me. Because of you. Our sins are the very things that drove Him to the cross. But instead of us having to pay the price, He took on the death we deserve, and gives us the life and eternity that only He is worthy of. This is grace. His precious blood was spilled so that we don't have to feel the full weight of all of our sins.
This means that whatever sin we struggle with - however distant we feel from God, no matter how many times we feel guilty because of poor choices we've made - it's already been taken care of. The power that sin has over you was nailed onto that cross when our Jesus was. "The curse of sin has no hold on me." Through Christ, we are set free from the chains of sin that we so easily wrap ourselves up in. So even when I stray, God is constantly pursuing me, waiting on me with open arms like the Prodigal Son to come back.
Good Friday is the day, 2000 years ago, that everyone felt that all hope had died. It was a miserable day, but what they didn't know was that Sunday was coming. Jesus could not be held in the grave. But if Good Friday was a day of mourning, and Sunday was a day of nonperishable hope, what was Saturday all about?
Saturday was the day of waiting. The day where there was still no hope to be found. It was the day after Jesus was crucified. The disciples and Christ followers had to find a way to live again without the Man they had followed for the past three years. In all things, waiting is hard, but in this situation, it would be almost unbearable. Waiting without hope.
If you feel that's where you are, know that Sunday is coming! Whatever you are facing, it will come to an end. Find hope through Christ, who has trumped death forever.
"I wait for the Lord, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope." (Psalm 130:5)
I hope that you all have a wonderful, spirit-filled Sunday, my friends! Tomorrow is a day of celebration of our Jesus Christ.
"By His wounds, we are healed." (Isaiah 53:5)